Smallville Drabbles!

[aloneindarknes7]

Alright, finally, here are my first pieces of contributation to the SV community. A bunch of drabbles ranging from crack to angst and a lot of stuff in between, though most are just humor and nothing goes into naughty detail. Sorry. 

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters or else I'd be filthy rich by using them as porn stars.

Title: The Most Important Meal of the Day
Genre: Humor
Pairing/Characters: Clex
Word Count: 350

            Lex placed his cup of coffee on the table and turned the page of the copy of The Daily Planet that he was reading since The Inquisitor sucked and really all others just didn’t have anything important written in them half the time.

            He reached for his coffee cup again and his hand froze on it as it squished a bit within his grasp. Lex looked around his newspaper and stared at the blueberry muffin in his hand that, upon further look, might actually had been a blackberry muffin. His attention then turned to Clark, hiding behind the fruit bowl that was steaming, as he focused intently on the muffin in his own hand.

            “Clark,” Lex sighed and laid his newspaper off to the side. “Why is that apple steaming?”

            “Yes, Lex?” Clark inquired innocently as he acted like he had misheard his boyfriend. Lex didn’t buy that innocent expression for one moment since he knew Clark better now; that look was pure Believe Me Cause I’m Cute and he had stopped falling for it. Not when his fruit was steaming and his coffee mug had turned into one of the muffins Clark had been eating.

            “The apple,” Lex pointed to the steaming apple on the top of the pile.

            “Why of course you can have an apple, Lex; breakfast is the most important meal of the day after all.” Clark grinned. “But I think you should finish your muffin before you start on the apple.”

            Lex sighed; Clark was on his Let’s Mark Lex Healthy So He Can Live Longer phase still. He ate the muffin, knowing he had no other choice and really Martha’s muffins should never go to waste. “Can I have my coffee now?”

            “Sure, Lex, here’s your teeth whitening apple that so much better than that teeth staining coffee.” He picked up the apple and sure enough, Lex’s coffee was underneath it, still steaming.

            Lex bit into the apple as he glared at Clark. He was going to have to talk to Martha about Clark’s habit of watching Opera and taking her advice so seriously.

Title: Riddle Me This, Luthor
Genre: Humor
Pairing/Characters: Clark Kent and Lex Luthor
Word Count: 100

            “Hey, Lex,” Clark strolled into Lex’s office and tossed his backpack onto the couch. The Kents finally had agreed to let Clark come over when he needed Lex’s help with his homework. “Have you heard of this riddle before? Why is a farmer the pillar of his community?” Clark asked eagerly.

            Lex shrugged, smiling at how childish Clark could be sometimes. “I don’t know, Clark, why?”

            Clark’s smile grew with a few pre-giggles. “Because he’s always outstanding in his field,” Clark’s giggles turned into full blown laughter and Lex’s smile faltered. Sometimes, he wondered why he was friends with Clark.

Title: Why Fangirls Aren't in Charge of Writing Smallville
Genre: Crack
Pairing/Characters: Clex, Jonathan Kent
Word Count: 100

             Lex stared up at the panting boy above him, the boy that had just saved his life, the boy who had just pressed his swollen, wet lips to his own which he was slightly aware had to be in the same condition. “I swore I hit you.” The boy hesitated and looked at the bridge then back at Lex, his forehead creased with confusion.

            “If you had,” The boy stared Lex in the eye and then his eyes slowly shifted down to Lex’s wet crotch. “Then I’d be dead.” He leered at Lex.

            Lex continued to pant heavily and leaned up on one of his arms. The boy was hot when wet. Using his other arm, he wrapped it around his savior’s neck and pulled him down into another kiss. Then they had sex and everyone was happy save for Jonathan Kent who showed up halfway through Lex’s second orgasm.

Title: Oh Opossum
Genre: Humor
Pairing/Characters: Clark Kent, Lex Luthor, and opossum
Word Count: 250

             Another Saturday, another long drive in one of Lex’s new cars that seemed to magically appear, and another moment that Clark understood why Lex got into car crashes. Especially since that was definitely a ‘thud’ that he just heard.

            And which Lex had apparently heard as well since they were suddenly screeching to a halt.

            “What did we hit?” Lex asked as he parked his car and looked out his open window.

            “I think it’s a opossum.” Clark squinted as he looked in the rearview mirror. “Let’s go see if it’s okay.”

            They were both standing over the seemingly dead opossum when Clark started to pout. “You killed it, Lex.”

            “Please, it’s a opossum; it’s playing dead, that’s what it does.” Lex stated as he rolled his eyes. “Besides, I probably just stunned it.”

            “No, I really think you killed it, Lex.” Clark reached out and tentatively poked the creature. “We should burry it or else it will probably come back to life and try to kill you for revenge. After all, this is Smallville.”

            “Clark, don’t touch that. You don’t know where it’s been.” Clark poked it again. Poking dead things just seemed to be fun. “Clark—” The opossum suddenly roared to life and sank his teeth into Clark’s finger.

            Lex and Clark both stared wide eyed, as the opossum’s teeth shattered and the creature darted away, making a sad opossum noise.

            Clark licked his lips and glance up at Lex. “You were right, you didn’t kill it.”

Title: Ruling Without You
Genre: Angst
Pairing/Characters: Clex, Martha Kent
Word Count: 100

            On the day that Clark realized he was in love with Lex, Lex was in another car accident. But he didn’t have Clark around to save him and he died.

            Years later, when Clark became Kal-El and completed his destiny, he had ordered his parents, the last part of his humanity that hadn’t died along with Lex, taken to a remote to be taken cared of as thanks for raising him. While dragged away, Martha had only asked one question, “Why?”

            Kal had calmly replied, “Lex would have done it one day anyway.” Then returned to his lonely throne room.

That's my first wave! I have a few more drabbles written and then I'm working on two short stories and one chaptered story with Overlord!Clark in it and Sexslave!Lex as well. I know, sounds good, right? You can never have enough of those!